More vanilla than backdoor escorts, backpage escorts allow rimming or analingus but their escort services do not include anal sex. If a 69 is required they may offer brownpaper for an extra fee. Sex writer AMELIA FERGUSON explores the terminology.
In this kinky, perverted age in which we live, where all things are permissible as long as they don’t hurt anyone, it’s a simple fact that women’s frontal body parts, equipped for the pleasure of both giver and receiver, are not satisfaction enough for many men.
Therefore over the course of our promiscuous era, where the liberation of the birth control pill enabled sex to be commodified and reified as a lifestyle exchange like never before, we started to hear about the unique appeal of back door girls, and in our industry, we found that backdoor escorts serve a prosperous niche where ladies of the night can make extra profits by virtue of their capacity to open their rear entrance to eager travellers of the hershey highway.
Backpage Escorts - Rimming Services
Yet just as every social media platform spawns its parasites, like Instagram’s popularity spawned Instavideo, Instaweather and Instacollage, so it is that even mainstream sexual activities, such as Greek, Sixty-Niners and BDSM, breed little variations and subsequently their aficionados.
And so the practice of anal rimming, also known as analingus, spawned its backpage girls, and again in our industry, the backpage escorts.
In these Antipodean climes, we don’t yet have Backpage brothels dedicated to this practice and this practice alone, but just as Cougartown in Riverwood caters to gentlemen who prefer a more mature woman, so one day we may have Analingal Avenue opening up in a backstreet alley near you.
Indeed back page escorts are said to be the vanilla version of back door hookers. They allow you to perform rimming on them, but no penetration of the anal cavity. Yes these backdoor escorts will allow you to lick their rosebuds, gently, meticulously, repetitively, they may even allow frenzied blabbering, or even the occasional thrusting of one’s tongue beyond her gates of heaven or hell depending on your persuasion, but punters be warned, no amount of money will induce a backpage escort to succumb to deep penile penetration. They advertise as back page escorts because the page can be poetically written upon, it can go from blank canvas to scrawls and doodles, but it’s for punters of the literary persuasion, punters who prefer the erotic pangs of unrequited love to the after-the-act disappointment that generally follows a conquest where banging on the door led to being welcomed in then staying too long, consoled only with the hollowness of post-anal-coitus nihilism - indeed some men would rather not know the ending of the story. They forever are lapping at the daintiest exclamation mark, in reverence and worship, their high priestess above them, their slavery and submittance sublime.
So, I hear you, the perennially sexually curious, begin to form the next logically hornbag enquiry, being to articulate, if such a divine courtesan wishes only to receive their backpage annotation, what then of the scrubbier, scruffier call-girls, who are willing to forego oral dignity in the pursuit of the “extra dollars”? What do we call prostitutes who perform rimming on you? Somewhat derogatorily, they’re known as “brown paper escorts
Such a titular term is barely tongue-in-cheek, dear readers, and there are those in the most westward outreaches of the Northern Hemisphere whose tongues will be wagging in the belief the correct term is reverse parking, as alluded to in a scene from The Italian Job starring Michael Caine which was unfortunately found on the cutting room floor by a junior editor and shown at the Milan Short Film Festival before being further cut down by a copyright threat.
It's to be expected that the Western side of the USA had a contribution to make and indeed the terms salad tossing and butt-eating have emerged from California’s porn studios with Salad Tossers 3 (1979) having gained most notoriety thanks to its thematic claim the male G-spot is located in the anal cavity and therefore remains the golden egg as far as brownpaper escorts are concerned.
And finally, what then for anal sex aficionados who marvel at the majesty of the mutual moment? They let you do backpage to them while they simultaneously do brownpaper to you. Indeed with a little extra flexibility it’s possible to do mutual rimming. Combined backpage and brownpaper escorting is just starting to be promoted as a thing for those for whom a 69 needs a few extra numbers. Thumbs up for a reverse double-sided page anyone?
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